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I'm Tired. I'm Frustrated. This is Why.

As you can see, mental and emotional health is an enormous emphasis in my life right now. I have been working to finish off my book, while new opportunities have risen. To become immersed in this space of mental health can be tricky, and I am trying to ensure I am going about it in the healthiest way possible.


But I am tired. And I am frustrated.


The universe has thrown me numerous signs over the past two weeks that I am headed in the right direction with my purpose in life. It has also shown me that it is time to throw myself further into the fire because how we approach mental health is not working.


Over the course of the past two weeks, a handful of people have either reached out to me, or impacted my life in a major way without even realising.


A good friend of mine, who works in the mental health field back in the states, reached out to me after a social media post. He wanted to discuss some things around mental health and see what my views were, compared to his and what is taught in the American field today.


We both agreed on many things throughout that phone call, but the one thing we definitely agreed on- we are taking the wrong approach to mental health.


As athletes, we train our bodies to avoid injury. We call this prehab. Strengthening our muscles, understanding certain movements better, and becoming the best version of ourselves. We are no good to a team if we are not available to play, or if we are hampered by energy.


Athletes bodies are viewed as the most important thing in their life. They take precautions to ensure it is as healthy and high functioning as possible. Why are we not taking this same approach to mental health? Why are we waiting until we are in too deep? Why do we wait to label someone as "sick" before we decide to help them? The human mind and the soul are the most incredible things on this planet, yet we do not treat them that way.


An even better question- why are we so detached from understanding and accepting mental health, that we are allowing ourselves and others to pass the point of no return?


These are my key points where I am so angry with our approach to mental and emotional health.


I have friends that struggle greatly with depression. I know many athletes going through dark times, but the world would never know.


Last week, an individual I know took their own life. One of the most genuine, beautiful people you will ever meet that only wanted to brighten up the world of others.


This one rocked me for some reason. I was not particularly close to them, but they were someone who was always trying to be the light in others lives.


I still do not have the answers definitively at this point as to why I felt this so deeply within me, and that is okay. Maybe I see myself in them. Or maybe it is because I feel like I need to do more for people to understand the lack in our approach.


There are many thoughts going through my head at this time surrounding their passing, but for the time being, I am just going to allow myself to feel everything that I am- the sadness, the disappointment, the anger and the frustration, because through that, I will find peace and I will get the answers that I need from it.


Interestingly enough, I had a few kids that I have coached in the past, reach out to me in regards to their own mental health. One as young as twelve years old. Twelve.


The consistent theme in the three of them- they're embarrassed to feel depressed. Seriously, what are we doing as a society that young boys and girls are embarrassed about their feelings? When is enough going to be enough?


I for one, have had enough. There are too many beautiful people in this world that do not see the light in themselves. I am one of them. It is time to change that.


The Japanese have a saying, "You have three faces. The first face you show to the world. The second face, you show to your close friends and family. The third face you show no one." We are constantly showing the world who we are not rather than who we are, and that is the beginning of our problems.


Earlier this year, I spoke about starting my own foundation to bring an awareness to mental health. That time to start has become more apparent, and something I will strongly push over the next couple of months with Carlie. As that vision has remained fluid and is ever evolving, I know the general direction that it needs to head in. We must normalise being okay with exactly who we are, and we must allow vulnerability to be the norm not emotional suppression.


I have travelled all over the world and the same issues that plague us are in every single society irrespective of beliefs, location and socioeconomic status, yet we do nothing about it.


My own journey has been filled with these difficulties, something that I have documented in my writing here. But it is because of these immense struggles, that I feel ready to do what is needed to make the change. I have walked this difficult path and found the light on the other end.


I have found my purpose and I cannot begin to tell you how liberating it has felt.


While this post seems to have turned more into a rant, then uplifting, I feel it is what was needed.


Let's begin to heal ourselves from the start, rather than waiting until it is too late and we are in too deep. Let's normalise being okay with who we are, and how we feel, because we are all here for a reason. There is no reason to put the mask on, pretending to be who you are not.


We all crave to be who we truly are. It is time that we start giving into that.


Please find comfort in who you actually are. Check in on your people. More importantly, check in on yourself. If you ever need someone to talk to, you know where I am.


Love to you all.